Brain Chatter

Sometimes I fall silent, withdrawing quietly in reflection. I’m quiet, outwardly I don’t say much, inwardly my head chatters like a radio scanner. Chatter overlapping chatter, internal dialogue, an overactive need to fix any and everything today and five years from now and impossibly things that have passed. I have the chatter of self-talk running rampant. An underlayer of guides trying to guide my haphazard ass into a direction I can’t quite grasp. It would be a hell of a lot easier if they didn’t speak in symbols or as I call it code haha. Beaver, beaver, turtle, feather, and some dimes. Sure, yeah I know exactly what that means.

Cryptic dreams, the messages that just couldn’t. A dream of trying to sleep and dream but getting woke up constantly and trying to go back to sleep in real life and the dream a hazy recall of symbols in the dream within the dream. Sometimes there’s the dream that could too much. I once had a dream within a dream within a dream and remember the dreams. This was not a false awakening but rather I was dreaming and went to bed and dreamed and then went to bed in that dream and dreamed. I had two different dreams occurring within the original dream.

Tonight the chatter is real. I hope soon to hush the buzz and hum when I go to bed, but I think maybe messages are waiting. My tv shut off on its own earlier, I would assume it was a fluke were it not for the fact my mom’s tv just glitched the day before. Plus, I have that feeling that impression of being watched, the feeling of a patient person who can not be seen waiting for a talk, I have been ignoring it for a few days, but it seems to be important. At this point, I suspect it is my dad or close family, hopefully, I can get in that sleeping space to talk. I may struggle with communication when awake, but I am blessed that under the right circumstances I can have a two-way conversation in a sleep state. Goodnight, good day, everyone I hope that your messages come in clearer and that your dreams are good and that your day is even better.

Published by izzysconfessions

I was born and raised in the smallest of towns in Southwest Virginia. A town that is extraordinarily active, yet a town that is like it's very own little mini Bible belt. My dad was Baptist, my mom pentecostal, and I'm paranormal. I would venture to say it is somewhat of a family trait. One that is met with equal acceptance and curiosity as much as it is met with skepticism. Individually and collectively so much has been experienced and witnessed at times to such a degree that one might wonder how on earth there is room for doubt. I dont have all the answers, I do not have it all figured out. Im as human as everyone else relying heavily many mornings on a lot of coffee and a little Jesus. In fact, I can't decide what I want for dinner most days. One constant is I cannot go a single day without chocolate. Pour a cup of coffee, or a little tea and whiskey and join me in my confessions of a haunted freak.

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